Every person has that thing that sets them off. It’s just one or two things that will put them instantly on the war path. However, as a member of the female gender there are some of those “little things” we all have in common that turn us from sugar and spice to anger and malice. Through some research and experience as well I have complied a few of those things into this list. I assure you that saying any of these things will make your girl bite your head off. My advice, study these and don’t, under ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, say these to or near your female counterpart: if you do, it is at your own risk.
That chick is hot
She already will notice when you check out another girl’s chest, if you say anything it just makes it worse. Women already have enough physical issues that we don’t need any help giving ourselves reasons to feel ugly. To be honest she probably knows that you think some other girls are hot but she may like to think that she is the hottest girl you know. If you know any better you won’t give her reason to think otherwise. If she doesn’t like herself it will be miserable for you too.
I don’t like your friend(s)
If she likes her friends then it should be obvious why you shouldn’t say this but some guys don’t get it. I understand, girls will say who they don’t like of your friends but you can’t talk about her friends. You just can’t. This goes for her sister or mom or aunt or any other female in her life. This is even more important if you swear. As soon as you call her friend a bitch she will instantly be on the defensive. You don’t want to go there, you really don’t.
You look like crap
It would seem obvious not to say this but it isn’t that simple. Because this is a common phrase you may slip and say it to your lady. She will likely get upset unless she really really feels like crap. Then again even if she feels like crap she might have tried not to look like crap but you just pointed it out. If you really want to know what’s wrong just ask what’s wrong instead. You are less likely to make a subconscious statement about her looks that way.
Any negative comment on physical appearance
We all know some women grow unibrows or mustaches or some of them are just plain hairy. Don’t comment. She may need a manicure or to get that bunion scraped off her foot. Don’t comment. If you think she needs a tan, don’t comment. If you are leaning in for the kiss and you get a glimpse of the girl’s ‘stache either get over it or get out. Women do enough primping and preparation for everyday to know these little things that you think you’re the first one to notice. Waxing hurts ok, the spa is expensive, and some other things are plain time consuming. Beauty is pain is not just a hyperbolic saying, it is often true. Your girlfriend or wife has probably already decided her beauty limits, don’t push it. If you’re willing to walk into a spa and get your back waxed then MAYBE you can ask her to accompany you.
Any negative comment on clothing
There is a difference between reminding your girlfriend that you are going to a black tie event and telling her you don’t like her outfit. Again we already have self esteem issues we don’t need you to add on. We put time, effort, and money into our appearance. From the messy bed head to the glam diva the girl did not just roll out of bed, believe me I know. Whatever it is that she is wearing, she put some work into and you saying you don’t like it is a comment you can keep to yourself. If she asks answer at your own peril. If you piss her off she may just not want to go and then you have a bigger problem on your hands.
If you think she is overreacting just think it don’t say it. This is kind of a tricky one for several reasons. She may know she is overreacting and that is probably why she is telling you. She wants to vent and she was holding it in and since she trusts you she is now venting to you just to get it off her chest. In that case just listen, when you try to give advice she will probably agree with you because she already knew the situation was crazy. On the other hand she may be venting and really be that passionate about whatever it is. If that girl in the office next to her was wearing the same dress and it just burns her to know that she wore that on the same day just to spite her then nod your head and listen (or at least pretend). As soon as you say overreacting you have turned her anger or frustration to you. If it already was on you then maybe you should try a different approach next time.
Can you make me a sammich?
If you actually use the word sammich which is supposedly funny now that is even worse. This goes hand in hand with any questions in that group like “What’s for dinner?” or “Can you make something else?” NO! If you want something else you should make it yourself. Not only are you insinuating that she should be partaking in some 1950s gender role but you also just insulted her cooking. Those women in the kitchen jokes may have been funny for a little while but they got old fast. Plus if you feel like you can just ask for a sandwich anytime you want one then you better be prepared to take out the trash anytime she asks. I think that is a fair trade off.
Are you on your period?
This is the end all be all of bad things to say to your girlfriend or wife. If you weren’t fighting before you said it you will be for sure after. We don’t like when you try to find a reason for our seemingly irrational anger. We have been to health class too and it seems like all that guys remember is that girls have mood swings during their periods. Two things about that: First, that is not always true and second, if it is true for your girl you have now opened a can of emotional, hormonal worms that you have to deal with.
Let me explain why that question makes our blood boil. That question says that you think whatever she was just talking about is the spontaneous result of her being on her period. Basically you just said “You’re being irrational so it must be your period talking.” To be honest that is kind of offensive. It seems like you were going to disregard whatever she was saying as mindless girl chatter. On top of that if you happen to be right now you pissed her off because she is fulfilling a stereotype thus giving you reason to assume you are right the next time you want to ask that question. That question digs a hole you absolutely can not get out of. There is no back track, you will just have to clench your teeth and be ready for the storm of anger.
On the other hand…
Of course words are not all any conversation is about. It isn’t always what you say but how you say it as well. None of these are grounds for break up they are just general hotspots for the general female population. Then again if you know your female counterpart then, you likely already know her limits. Go with what you know but if you know nothing try at least not to go with what’s written directly above…