According to one scientific study, the average person needs the average person needs 11 weeks to recover following a serious breakup. Of course, if you’ve recently been through a breakup of your own, you might be questioning this finding – the pain inflicted from an especially traumatic split can feel like it’ll last a lifetime (just ask Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez). No two people handle a breakup in the same way, and no two breakups are exactly alike in their circumstances.
But it’s important to be able to recognize some of the common signs that you’re ready to date someone new so that you can value your recovery, and then get back into the game when you’ve had enough time to heal.
You’re Over It
Be honest with yourself: Are you still an emotional wreck when you merely think about your breakup?
Do you constantly find yourself wondering what you did wrong, or how you could have salvaged the doomed relationship? If so, then you’re not over it just yet. But if you can talk to friends and family about your breakup without feeling upset, regretful, or – worse – bursting into tears, then you just might just be ready to move on.
You Know What You Want
Breakups are rarely easy, but one of the plus sides of a failed relationship is that it can teach you more about what you want (and don’t want) in your next romance. Maybe your jobless ex- has led you to realize just how important it is to find somebody who’s as motivated and driven as you are; or maybe your stuck-up past-partner has helped you understand how important a sense of humor is in a healthy relationship.
If your last relationship has now made you feel more confident about what you want in your next partner, it means you’ve emotionally matured.
You Have Time to Date
Let’s face it: dating is a commitment in more ways than one. It takes a lot of time and effort to get out “into the field” to meet new people(fuck buddy), let alone get to truly know them.
This is why it’s important to analyze where you’re at in your life and determine whether you realistically have time to start dating. If you’re swamped with work, trying to finish school, or have other obligations taking priority, it might be better to wait until you have more time to dedicate to dating. But if you find yourself Netflix and chilling by yourself every Friday and Saturday night, why not play the field to find someone to cuddle with?
You’ve Been Focusing on Yourself
Most people who have been through a breakup will tell you that the best thing about coming out of a relationship is reclaiming the freedom to do what you want. This newfound liberty can give you a great chance to focus on betterment and self-love. If you feel as though you’ve taken the time to improve yourself, appreciate what it means to live independently, and still feel like your life would be best shared with an amazing person, then hey – maybe you should throw that ol’ hat back into the dating ring.
Ultimately, only you can determine whether or not you’re ready to start dating again. If you choose to start again, ease into it and keep things as casual as possible at first. Just remember, no matter how terrible or awkward the date may be, there are always ways to pull the ripcord!